For the month of June, I’m staying in the Pittsburgh area, where my mother grew up and where her family settled in the 19th century. They were all coal miners from South Wales and Northumberland, England.
The list of people I’m researching is ridiculously long with many collateral branches, and I’m starting to feel a little obsessive compulsive about it. I had to make a spreadsheet to keep track of the facts I still need to confirm, and so far it has about 160 people on it. At the Allegheny County Courthouse, I drove the clerks a little crazy because I requested documentation on 31 marriages!
I love the research, but the highlight of my stay so far has been meeting my cousin Melody for the first time. She’s the daughter of my mother’s first cousin Grace, which makes us second cousins.
People often get confused when it comes to understanding the relationship between second cousins and beyond. Here’s a visual which might help:

Since Melody and I are second cousins, that makes our daughters third cousins. What about the once-removed part? That just means it’s a different generation. So Melody’s relationship to my daughter Caitlin is second cousin once-removed. My relationship to my mother’s cousin Grace is first cousin once removed.
Melody and I spent several days going through pictures in her mother’s house. I brought my Flip-Pal portable scanner and wore out the batteries over and over again! Melody’s mother had pictures of my mother, my grand parents, and my great-grandparents which I had never seen before. The most exciting one was an unidentified photograph which I believe is a picture of my great-great-grandparents, John Payne and Jane Weightman.

Compare that to this one which I already had, and which was taken many years earlier:

It’s hard to tell if they’re the same people, but it’s certainly possible – I’d love to find another descendant with a photo so we can compare. I have other photos of John Payne, and he’s always got that white beard so he looks like the same guy to me.
I loved seeing photos of my mother with her grandparents, who she loved so much:

and I just love this one of my Mom:

Melody shared many, many other photos with me, none of which I would have otherwise had, and all of which I will cherish. Researching your collateral relatives and finding second and third cousins is definitely worthwhile – you each might have different pieces of your family puzzle to share with each other!
Love this!
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what a beautiful picture of Aunt Mary Payne!!!
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Fascinating, Chris! So glad Melody and you met and have discovered so much meaningful family history together, especially through the pictures shared. I believe I see the similarities in the two pictures you showed us. Interesting to see them over a lifetime. Love the pictures of your mother as a young girl and beautiful young woman. Thanks again for sharing your experiences and teachable insights – this time about the significance and specialness of cousins removed – although in this case, Melody and you became wonderful “cousins close”, figuratively speaking.❤️😍
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Great post Chris…..loved the pictures of your mom!!! So interesting to see the eatly and later pic of Jane W.!!
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